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if only you ever knew how i felt. ; Tuesday, February 08, 2011 00:15
it's only your first year and you're feeling so sian of the team already.
do you know how many times i really wanted to quit?
do you know how many times i walked out of training?
do you know how many times i wished that i never wanted to go back again?
there are people everywhere telling me to stay, to be optimistic and to push the team together again. and though i know that my mind's set and it isn't possible to do so anymore, i'm still here now, standing before the team.
it's coming to three long years being to a blazerian. if a junior feels sucky, do you know how many times worse a senior would feel?
do you know how much i regret my choice to let go of the team once i knew i was enlisting last year because i couldn't bear to think of all of you in camp every night? and i know that was a very bad mistake and i can't turn back the clock.
do you know that i was asked to join another team countless times and i told them that i want to stay for my team till this nationals?
and now i start to wonder whether i've made the wrong decision to stay.
how many of you actually listen and remember anything that i say. everything that i say to you is a joke, isn't it?
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